May I have a towel with that rant, please? Jeez, Countdown’s canny but cranky interlocuter dishes a mean invective, but I’m now covered with YouTube saliva from the apoplectic force of Keith Olbermann’s recent tirade about Rudy Rudy Rudy Giuliani. And I thought I had issues. I believe Giuliani is an Ass Hat . . .
Is that a polyp?
. . . but I don’t want to have a stroke over it.
Giuliani should check his family tree and see if any of the roots are still living in the vicinity of ancient Pompeii, ’cause I sense that another eruption by Mt. Keithsuvius could lead to the obliteration of all life there, as we know it. I’m not a volcanologist, but I have been known to rage in red-faced fits of anger while trying to lay down voice tracks in the studio, so I know of that which I speak – uh, when I’m unable to speak properly while recording, that is.
My booming outbursts are silly and childish and make me look like a real idiot. Thankfully, I’m alone. No one’s watching me. The studios are supposedly soundproofed and no one can hear me, hopefully, for the words coming out of my mouth make this blog look like “Mary Had a Little Lamb” and would give Mary a heart attack – leaving the little lamb shell-shocked, dumbfounded and bare ass naked with all its wool having fallen out, curled on the floor and ready for knitting my own Ass Hat.
Why do I do it? I dunno, why does anyone do all the stupid shit they do? Why would you consciously do anything to hurt your health or offend others? Why do we put ourselves in positions that we know will lead to frustration, resentment and anger? Why do we think we can control our rage? Why do people think that life is always supposed to be nice and polite and pleasant to the senses?
There’s a part of me that believes my expletive-laden tirades are a reliever of stress or, at least, an indicator of too much stress and I probably should change my career path, if I can’t change the way I process the associated stimuli I deem too annoying for the average grunt of frustration. Parts of my job piss me off and how I’m handling it, of late, is only deteriorating. Thus, I can tell a change is required or I will go nuclear and the only casualty will be me. My head will explode.
Yes, I can be a fucktard, too, but I try to limit others’ ability to see into that dark side of my psyche, which is a bit bizarre, obviously, since I rant and rage on my blog. However, I think it’s healthy to get angry and release some steam or energy in, hopefully, a productive manner, but sometimes this doesn’t seem possible. Writing out my rage – as opposed to acting it out – works well for me, but may not be your cup of tea, either as a reader or a writer of your own experiences.
We are who we are and we do what we do. All the little self-help books, meditations, prayers, incense, holding hands, exorcisms and transcendent moments can only take us so far until reality slams us, once again, with something grating to rub up against. This is life. Mine, anyway.
If this realm was supposed to be utopian, it would be. That is why most world religions speak of a Heaven or similar realm – that is somewhere else. Whether that is real or metaphoric doesn’t lessen the pain and suffering one experiences when they find themselves attached to any particular outcome in any given moment. Breathe, detach and let go. It is the only way to find true peace. Then again, it’s just as cool to own your anger, if you’re not killing people in the process.
People who walk around spouting sunshine, constantly, make my ass twitch. Either they’re on drugs, brainwashed or they’ve been fortunate enough to not experience any serious pain in their lives. However, if they’re not affected by all that is “wrong” with this world or are hiding their head in the sand because they can’t handle it, then they better wake up. Reality is just around the corner – waiting to pounce.
Seeking solace or something to get you through the night . . . is alright. Thanks, John. Whatever gets you through the night is your business, but if you tell me that it always works, then I would probably consider you a liar or an isolationist who refuses to walk, talk, work and play amongst the heathens.
Apparently, I can’t see the world as you see it from atop that high horse you’re riding. From my perspective, however, your horse appears to have a Trojan branding, which you can’t see if you never get off it. And we all know that, whether it’s ancient Greece or modern Rome, if it’s branded Trojan, then someone’s going to get fucked.
Becoming a monk or nun because you can’t handle the world and just want to be alone to worship as you please isn’t realistic and rarely works in the long run. Someday, you’ll have to come down off that mountain and walk with the rest of us sinners.
How will you deal with reality’s harsh slap to your face when you encounter something beyond the realm of your previous “blissful” experience? Will you turn the other cheek? You may be surprised at how quickly your primal beast rises up to defend or attack. Of course, I am most certainly projecting what I think I would do and have no clue as to how profound your wisdom, peaceful heart and spiritual enlightenment have allowed you to transcend all Earthly suffering.
For Keith Olbermann, I say, “Rant on!” I’m glad someone is angry and not afraid to show it in public. I have only seen a couple of his verbal onslaughts, which made me cringe both times and caused me to wonder about how much good is actually accomplished by such verbal vitriol, but maybe it makes him feel better, at least.
If we don’t give voice to our pain, anger and frustration, then how do we know that Holocaust II, World War III or Armeggedon – The Really Big One – aren’t just around the corner, because no one spoke up? Of course, according to Christian fundamentalists, there is no amount of crying in the wilderness that will stop anything God has wrought or put into motion, which is why it seems like they’re trying to hasten Armegeddeon, since it’s inevitable. You fucktards are the stupidest pieces of shit to ever walk the planet.
What if I feel my greater power, spirit or Mumbo-Jumbo wants me to speak out against you? Will you pull your head out and listen? Will it matter? I say it does matter and I will not shut up, simply because some people might be offended by my opinions. I say, if they offend you, you may just be the fucktard I need to wake up.
I’d rather err on the side of annoying, offending or alienating some people – who might have considered my message had I not wrapped it up in such vehemence – than say nothing at all. With all the violence, mayhem, genocide, slavery, porn and abuse that this world generates, daily, as some people rape, murder and torture their own children, friends and neighbors behind the cloaks of religion, politics and a thousand different selfish justifications, I feel like screaming out – only to be heard above the din of iniquity.
We’re bludgeoned everyday with more senseless acts of stupidity, arrogance, hubris, self-righteousness, incompetence and utter madness from the likes of corporations, our political and religious leaders and even the familial guardians within our own homes. Jesus H. Fucking Christ – stop the madness! If an image, sound or written rant can’t arrest your attention from the mindless drivel that mass media, Wall Street and Washington D.C. normally dishes out, then how will the real truth be heard?
When you – Joe and Jane Consumer – demand that your media and leaders tone down the rhetoric, partisan bullshit, religious zealotry and marketing dreck that brainwashes you into remaining servile automatons who aren’t allowed to question your own government – the one bought and paid for by the blood of your forefathers and foremothers – demand answers and accountability and be patriotic while opposing the Iraq War for any reason, then you may see a shift in the proper direction. If our society becomes more quiet, peaceful and respectful of each other, welcoming debate and dissension, then I will temper my tongue, as well.
Until then, I’m right there in your face with the Olbermann’s of the world. Although, I don’t think I’ll be hooking up a webcam anytime soon. I have no problem in speaking my mind to the world and doing it from a stage, live, right now, but presently, my stage is The Tao of Kat and the written word still appeals to me more than putting up a podcast or YouTube window into my personal world. Some things are sacred, ya know. Besides, I like to scratch my ass in private.
So, keep spewing, Keith, and give those O’Reillys, Limbaughs, Coulters and their kind down the road. I’ll gladly mic you, light you and flip your cue cards. I’d rather dodge a few errant spitballs from a red-faced intellect, today, than a volley of lead balls by the far right-wing redneck motherfuckers, tomorrow, who think being a patriot means doing whatever their fucktard president says. The countdown to January 2009 can’t come soon enough.
Whew! I feel better. And you? Did I get any on you? Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go wipe off my monitor.
The Kat
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